Stinky Lee

Stinky Lee, aka Sydney Crane, aka Brian Browne, aka Miguel Confuente, aka Stinky Pete, aka Stinky Sam, aka Stinky Phil, aka Stinky Jim, aka Hands, aka The Shadow, aka Finger of Fudge, aka Paddy Shanks, aka Drymouth, aka Shifty, aka Patch, aka Pocket Dodger, aka Sudds, aka The Snail from the West, aka the Snail from the North, aka The Snail from the South, aka The Snail from the East, aka The Snail from the Northeast, etc. is widely considered to be on performance-enhancing drugs, or at least was during the Schnakes clan heats.

He never got out of the preliminary round of the 1000to1 heats after six years of competing and then, this year when he really should be passed his, up til then, mediocre best, cruised to the final and won it by two lengths over the next best snail. While SCEACFOSRA leave the choosing of each clan’s champion to each clan, they are ruthless with drug testing in the SnailRace8000. So if Stinky Lee did use drugs to win his 1000to1, he won’t be able to use them in the SnailRace8000. It begs the question, what is his endgame?

Whatever happens on the 8-Track or even in The Octagon, most snails think that Stinky Lee has nefariosity on his mind. Time will tell.